Very old posts-#1

START AT THE BOTTOM AND READ UP, I had to transfer old posts to this new blog


Ok prayer warriors
June 01, 2007
Ok prayer warriors, today is June 1st, sometime within the next few weeks, our medical is going through it's final review in China with the visiting doctors. This is our last remaining step before our approval. Please remember us in prayers, especially for the next few weeks. This review is very important, to say the least. We appreciate and need all the prayers we can get. Thanks.


Prayers needed please
May 22, 2007
Just heard from our agency, we didn't get bad news, but I did just get news that could delay the adoption a little. Our doctor updates passed preliminary appoval but CCAA (China's adoption office) has requested our medicals once again be reviewed from the visiting doctors (we went through this before for our pre-pre-approval). The visiting doctors only come once a month and won't be there again until the second week of June. Now the reason the delay could be very disappointing is because of the fact that we won't travel for at least 6-9 weeks from this approval. Delaying this last approval will mean an extra $1,000 for the plane ticket for Maegan (because she'll be over two then) plus we run in to the scary problem of figuring out how the boys will make it to school while we're in China. Worst case scenario would be us being turned down completely at final review (we feel we'll be ok because our information has all been in front of these doctors before and passed their review).

Our agency has requested the China representative to gently remind CCAA about our medicals already being put to the test with the visiting doctors and see if they will go on and approve us. This is just a very gentle push, we aren't in any position to get pushy. It would be completely in God's hands for them to go on and push us through now.

So long story short, please pray for us going through this last review, whether it be CCAA going on and saying we're ok now or if we have to wait till next month. I would love to jump on the first plane tomorrow but I know I have to leave it in God's hands. He knows best.

The good news, once we pass this approval, we're approved to adopt her. :)




a love letter to Maegan
May 20, 2007
Dear Maegan, weekends are hard on mommy. They give mommy time to think about you without as many interruptions. Weekends are the time I know I have to focus on finding the funds to bring you home. I can't give up just because I've approached the subject every possible way I can think of. I have to continue pushing myself because I know there's still some way out there that I just haven't found yet. So, I stare at the computer screen, I research different fundraisers, I've just about given up on grants. Mommy just can't seem to find the words to help the grant people understand what we need to bring you home. These people aren't bad, they're helping other families to bring children home, this makes those people good, just not the people that can help us.
Today I burst into tears after seeing a little girl your age in a bathing suit, I was reading how her parents are in China now, in the pursuit of bringing her home. I'll probably be crying again before I finish writing this. I miss you so terribly much, I want to hold you, kiss you, make sure you are safe and happy. My heart hurts, it aches without you in my arms. Without hearing your voice in the background playing with your brothers. Hearing your brothers and you arguing over this or that, I hear the future sometimes and it makes me miss you in the present.
How do I explain this love to someone? Love so strong for you, a little person I've never held, a little person whom I've never heard your voice, a little person that I don't even know what you really look like now (the pictures I have of you are ten months old today), a little person that may hate me when you meet me because I look different than the people that take care of you now and in your little world, I'll be a stranger that just shows up one day and takes you from everything you've ever known in the world.... How can all of this be true and yet I love you so much that I'm willing to give everything I have to bring you home, willing to talk to strangers and ask for help to bring you home, willing to beg on the street corner if I thought it would help? Why is all of this true? Because God has chosen you as my child and he's chosen a mommy for you that loves her children beyond what words can describe, that is willing to do anything for you. This is the mommy God has chosen for you sweetheart. I pray that when we're finally together in person, God will allow you to see these facts and allow you to love me back. If not, I will cry, yep, us mommies do that a lot, but I'll wait until you see me for the mommy I am.
I am your mommy, I may have never been blessed to carry you in my body like your brothers, but I feel you just the same, I swear sometimes I think I must be carrying you inside me some how, maybe it's because I carry your spirit with me. Daddy says I'm snoring like I did when your brothers were inside me! :) My emotions are everywhere and I swear I could eat everything in sight! lol So on second thought, maybe I am blessed to be carrying you inside me, maybe not in the traditional sense, but you are with me in every other sense of the word. There is never a waking or sleeping moment that you are not in my thoughts.
I love you, my sweet little angel and mommy will continue to do everything I can to bring you to my arms. I love you,
signed
Mommy




Waiting will drive you crazy.......
May 17, 2007
I don't know why I'd be surprised that waiting for Maegan through adoption would be any different than when I was pregnant. Waiting for my kids has always driven me crazy!! When I was pregnant, I used to get up in the middle of the night, wander with my beach ball tummy leading the way through the dark house, always ending up in our rocking chair, in the baby's room, just rocking, rubbing my belly, talking to our boys and wishing time would warp speed to their arrival.
Now, waiting for our Maegan, the waiting is just as agonizing, sometimes I think worse. You don't get to feel the baby move inside you to remind you of the coming days, you don't have people on the street stop and congratulate you or give you a chance to talk about the coming baby, because they can't tell anything by your physical appearance. The dates are just a guesstimate and if you go over your due date, you won't have a doctor willing to induce, you just have to wait miserably longer until a government decides it's time..... These things make it much harder. Now would I give up this journey? NO WAY!! Though the waiting is hard, I can't wait to hold our little girl in our arms, no matter how long it takes!! I will sit here every miserable day, I'm sure whining my way through them, but I'll wait them out because she's worth it.
It's hard for some people to understand how you could fall in love with a blurry picture and a brief description of a child and fight ferociously for this child as if they had been yours all along. But then again, don't we fall in love with our ultrasound pictures? We trace every little line, die in amazement to see them already sucking their thumbs, put these pictures on our fridges, etc. It's the same concept. :)
Anyway, sorry, guess this is my outlet for my waiting for the day.. :) And ideas on helping myself through the waiting period? I don't think Glenn could live through another shopping trip when I'm going to make myself feel better! lol




Can't stay down for long
May 08, 2007
Another adoption facto, you can't let yourself stay down long after a bad day, there's too much else to be done!
I decided to advertise in five counties through the Tennessean for our fundraising baby dolls (trying to generate more sales before we hopefully travel late this summer). They gave me a discounted rate since it was for the adoption so I thought I would share this with youall; in case it might help you too. The girl told me to make sure you call an office, rather than doing it online because the computer can't give you a discount but people can. :) :) (psttttttt, I saved the girl's number of who I talked to if anybody needs it, just email me)So, if you see an ad for Berenguer Baby dolls in your paper, it might my ad! :) Please pray that these ads generate lots of sales and not just lost money on the ad. Thanks so much. :)



Day 43
May 07, 2007
Most adoptive parents will tell you, our days are numbered, literally. We count each one with a vengence because each day we get through brings us one day closer to our children.
Well, for the record books, mark Day 43 from LID down as a really bad day for me. I just had a lot of discouraging things happen. I'm so soft hearted, it's hard not to take things personally. I know not everyone is on the edge of their seats to hear about our adoption but I am. That's all I know to talk about. That is our major/main objective for our family right now. I don't need to go on because this site is about Maegan not just me.
The new restrictions for Chinese adoptions were mentioned again today. Some people had heard of the restrictions (that weren't in place before May 1st) being enforced to people logged in before the deadline. This would be absolutely determental to us. Of course our waiting to hear whether or not China is satisfied with our doctors' letter updates isn't made any easier with this news.
My logic says God has a plan and he's carried you a long way for this to not be what he wants. The other side of me stares at this little girl's picture, worries and begs God to let her be mine...



Dang nab holidays!
May 04, 2007
We didn't think the Chinese holiday would be effecting us since we were just LID on 03-26 and thought we'd just be in the middle of a paper shuffle somewhere about this time. Turns out, you never know what will effect you or not. It took me a week to get our doctors' updates and since I wasn't thinking about the holiday (in the least little bit), I didn't get them in until the 1st (I thought I was doing good, getting the last update took me standing in front of the front desk in the doctor's office for forty minutes so they were intimated in to continuing to look for my update). UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! :( I know it doesn't make a huge difference in our time line but I usually wouldn't have let a deadline like a holiday coming up get past me. Duh to me! Dang nab holidays!!



Just a normal day missing you Maegan
April 19, 2007
Oh little Mae, mommy misses you! This is just a normal day in our waiting, nothing special, nothing to make me miss you more than any other day; every day is like this. Nothing is quite right without you, my days always seem to be lacking something, that something special is you! Who knew mommy's heart could have something missing all this time, when I only learned of you six months ago? It feels like my heart has always missed you. I guess that's because God always know you were to be ours. I'm so glad God has the wisdom to see what we need in our lives, even when we don't.
I wish so badly to see an updated picture of you, I bet you have a head full of hair now, maybe enough for two little ponytails. Certainly enough for a little bow.
I know it's probably just because you are ours but you look so much older than your age. Wisdom behind those eyes, a brilliant mind behind your beauty...
hopefully soon you'll be in my arms my little sweetheart, until then, you're always in my thoughts, my heart, my dreams...




Dreams of Maegan
April 14, 2007
I dreamed of Maegan last night!!!!! These dreams have been few and far between. Now I dream strange things on a nightly basis, this week alone, I was swimming with a whale and feeding him animal crackers! LOL All of these dreams and I seldom dream of Maegan, this was why this one was so special. :)There were no words between us, I just got to hold her in my arms.She must have started crying or yawning because I remember trying so hard to look in her mouth to see that her palate, it was just fine with a minor small hole on either side of the roof of her mouth. She is a special needs baby with a cleft palate if that part didn't make sense, sorry. :)I just had to share, I didn't want to get out of bed because I knew I'd start losing more and more of the dream from my memory. At least now I will have this to remember it by. :)Char




A gift from one mother to another
April 11, 2007
This morning I had a wonderful gift. A gift from one mother to another. There's an extra special something about this kind of gift that most often only another mother would understand. Now when I describe a mother, it is not just your traditional mother that gives birth to a child. A mother is a woman that has given her heart and soul to a child or children, whether through birth, adoption, a niece or nephew, God children, or that special child down the road that you've watched grow up and if they were to fall off their bike, you'll probably be in a race with the birth mother to get to the child. :) I think that would be a good description of a mother, not every mother has been blessed to have a child of their own with them all the time.
On to our gift. For the last six years, we've been attending a charity event that tries (successfully) to raise money for cancer treatment/awareness for children with cancer. The event is called Cruefest. These events were started to honor the memory of Skylar Neil, the daughter of Motley Crue's lead singer, Vince Neil (who lost his daughter to cancer). These events are usually weekend long events where fans of the band Motley Crue get together to see old friends and new, hear bands that donate their time and music, and bid on auctions, all money raised going to charities to try to prevent the loss of more children (or anyone for that matter) from cancer. This event is very near and dear to our hearts because of the true genuine feelings generated at these events, the hard work the organizers go through, and the wonderful friends that we've met over the years that we now call family.
Sorry, I said I was getting to our gift but I'm long winded, I never can tell the short story. As much as Cruefest has meant to us over the years, bringing our daughter home has meant even more so when we looked at our home to try to decide what we could part with to sale, to raise the money for her adoption, nothing was more important than our daughter, including our years of collectables and one particular collectable, a hand made clutch purse from the 2005 Cruefest.
I put this item on Ebay with the same little wince I felt with our other collectables but never looked back. This morning, I had a beautiful gift from another mother. She contacted me, telling me she understood what a mother would do for their child but for this particular item, it would not include us parting with it. She instead donated $50 to us to take down the auction and keep the purse. This was truly a gift from the heart. This long story is to thank her. Corrie (CruetotheCor on Shout), thank you, from one mother to another. You are now one of the cherished people in our lives that is part of bringing our little girl home.
Thanks for reading my novel, Char




Ramblings of an expectant mom....
April 06, 2007
My mom took me to lunch at a Chinese buffet yesterday (all my life, I've only stayed and ate at one other Chinese restaurant (and that was probably ten years ago, every other time was take out). I can hardly describe the feelings. All I could think of was Maegan, I was comparing every waitress to what Maegan might look like at that age or this one's age. The decorations everywhere were memorizing to me. It was overwhelming! lol I stared at all the food as I walked the buffet and wondered if this was what it would be like when we were in China, seeing all kinds of food I wasn't used to; did I forget to mention I'm your typical meat & potatos girl, with occasional rice and pizza thrown in for variety?? lol (I'll probaby loose 30 pounds in China! lol) I tried not to stare at someone from the restaurant's son that was walking around while we ate. I wanted to stop everyone there and tell them all about Maegan! lol How could anyone but an expecting adoptive mom go through all that on a trip for lunch?!? lol It was like I was 8 months pregnant in Babys-R-Us all over again! lol Sorry, the ramblings of an expectant mom....



Wooooo hoooo, snoopy dancing!!!!
April 02, 2007
We are officially LOGGED in to China!!! Yea!!! Our LID date is 03-27-07! For those of you not used to the adoption lingo, this means our paperwork is in China and logged in to their system for review! The official count down starts once you're LID. Yea!! :) This doesn't change our estimates of hoping to travel late July but it is another big step done with the process. Had to share our good news!!! :)
Charlotte



Got to be girly! :)
March 22, 2007
Since China is known for giving all the children close hair cuts, what a more perfect way to stay girly but a bracelet! Here's Maegan's first!! :)



WOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOO, we're Dossier to China!!!
March 19, 2007
WOOOOOOO HOOOOOOO!!!! We're DTC today!!!! That means our paperwork is on a plane to China today!!!! We're mega closer to bringing Maegan home!! It took six months of paperchasing and governmnet hoops to make here but we're here! Praise the Lord!!!!!!!!!!
Ohhhhh, we're hoping to be China bound this July!! :) :)
HAPPY CAMPERS tonight!!!!!!!!!



Want to go shopping??
March 07, 2007
If you've got to be shopping online anyway, click on the below link to make sure it's not a store listed. If it is a store listed and you enter the individual store from clicking on this link, we can a small credit for 'referring' you. We'll try any fund raiser that's free to do. :) It doesn't cost you anything extra either.
I also just spent two hours posting a ton of baby and toddler clothes on Ebay. :)


Another way to help
March 06, 2007
There's another way to help, (if anyone wants to). We're quickly running out of items to sale. I never let myself collect too much because I've always spent it on the kids but now that means I don't have anything left to sale (ok, so I'm not very talented in the craft area and people aren't buying those! lol).We've already had a few very generous dear friends donate some Motley items for us to auction. If you have a duplicate item in your collection that you wouldn't mind parting with, or any collectable for that matter (they seem to sell well), precious moments, other band stuff, anything you think (baby and toddler clothes sell like hot cakes!). It would only cost you the shipping to us, we'll take care of the rest. I like to put on my donated auctions the fact they're donated as well. Thank you all for your support and encouragement. I will be sure to share lots of pictures when we get her home. Charlotte



AMAZING DAY-DONE PAPERCHASING!
March 02, 2007
Yesterday and today have been amazing for developments! We got our I171h approval yesterday! Woo hoo!!! (That's our approval from the U.S. Government to adopt overseas) Then today my passport arrived!! The only other thing we had to send for our dossier was another set of passport pics for Glenn and I, pictures of the house, us with the kids and a picture of the entire family. The entire family picture had us stuck, who was going to take the picture??? I loaded the kids up and drove to the dealership where Glenn's boss took our family portrait. I drop the film off at Walgreens, take the kids out to Wendy's for dinner and go back to pick them up. Duh! Glenn's boss had his finger over the flash! They didn't turn out! I immediately went in to resourceful mode. I questioned the cashier, if I can fit my whole family in front of your passport screen, will you take our picture?? lol He said yes! So here we are, all four of us squeezing in front of the tiny (meant for one person) passport screen. I guess we were making memories. lol We had the Walgreen people laughing with us.
To top the night off, we got to seal our Fed-Ex to be sent to Heritage tomorrow. I made Glenn kiss it for luck with me! lol I never claimed to not be goofy, why were you wondering! lol
Great day! We're through paperchasing! As long as everything makes it through authentication ok that is. :)



To everyone, you think you can't but you can!
February 27, 2007
I keep having people telling me, I wish I could help, I really do but I can't think of a way I can. I've had people tell me, I could afford but $5 or $10 dollars but I don't want to insult you, I know you need more. No, $5 or $10 is great!! Really! $5 or $10 adds up! It gets us one little step closer to where we need to be. You have to think of it in larger terms, it would only take ten people to give a donation of $100 (at ten a piece). Every little bit does counts and we appreciate every penny. There is no insulting donation to us.
Check out our ebay items:
We're grasping for ideas to raise money, any ideas to help raise money is worth sharing with us. Please forward us any ideas you have. charlliesweb@yahoo.com
Please, add us to your prayer list, leave us encouraging words on our guestbook, everyone has something to give. You never know what might not seem 'enough' to you, could mean the world to a desperate mom wanting to bring her baby home. :)



Maegan's dolly
February 20, 2007
Maegan, Mommy got a surprise in the mail today, your doll! She's adorable, she has her little toes curled up, just like you do in your picture. Mommy doesn't know whether to hold on to her for a little while to remind me of you or to put her in your care package.
If I do put her in your care package, I'm going to sew your initials somewhere on her clothes or body so if she'll be extra special for you. :)



Reflections from my heart
February 17, 2007
It's amazing the changes that have occured in my heart and life since the Lord placed Maegan and adoption in my heart. Beforehand, I've always loved my children and family with all my heart but I kept trying to save 'me' from being lost. I never realized I had never lost 'me', 'me' had changed. I was a mother and wife but thought that being those things meant having to lose my identity. When God spoke to me about my little girl, I realized God's plans for my life. It is ok to not want a career or be about what the world thinks you should be about. Life is about sharing God's love with your family and your children. And if that makes you glow with happiness, maybe that's what God has planned for your life.
I look at these children without families, and think of what my little girl may feel like right now without us and it's beyond anything I can fathom. I just don't understand why the entire world doesn't feel the strong pull I do toward these children. I guess if they did, there would be no orphans. I thank God for these feelings he's given me because they have brought me so much closer to him and I've learned to lean on him so much stronger. I feel so humbled to be given such a gift of being allowed to adopt my little girl. I pray for other families to feel these feelings and learn the love of a child through adoption. I wish there were more I could do to teach other families about adoption. I just thank God that he opened my eyes to this precious gift. Thank you Lord.



Mommy's been shopping
February 16, 2007
Maegan, today Mommy let herself shop for you for the first time! :) Mommy's been waiting for this. Sadly, I haven't found the outfit I want to be classified as your first outfit. Yet...
But.. Mommy did find your first doll. I have a little sleeping outfit coming for her too to keep her warm.




The 48 day wait...
February 14, 2007
Waiting is so not an attribute of mine. I whine, I cry, I try to distract myself, I whine some more, I pray and pray. Patty, my adoption buddy was there for it all. Always the supportive fellow mother. She was so encouraging!
After forty eight days of waiting, we were given the best Valentine's gift of our lives, our official Pre-Approval to adopt Maegan from China. For the non-adoption community, this mean, China recognizes us as the family that has requested Maegan to be their child. And if we meet their standards, they will allow our adoption.




We joined the Criminal World today
January 23, 2007
We joined the Criminal World today, ok well not really but we were finger printed like real criminals! lol Today we submitted ourselves to being fingerprinted by the Federal Government to be part of our background check for our Immigration application to adopt an orphan.
I even got a compliment, she said I have good prints! :) The Nashville office was great!!



What's the sense in waiting around??
December 14, 2006
With a happy tear stained key board, I continued to look around when Heritage's new Special Needs list came out. Of course, the new list came out one day after our pre pre-approval (now tell me God didn't have a hand in that!). I saw our beautiful little girl. BUT someone else had placed her on hold to review her file. I sighed and continued looking down the list. I emailed poor Peggy at Heritage only a zillion times the next few days, asking her if she's email me the instant someone released their hold on a child so we could review a child's file. (Holds are basically good one week) A week goes by and suddenly there's an email from Peggy. One child, one file had been released. Our beautiful Maegan of course! :) Peggy emailed me her medical to review and her pictures. I was instantly love struck and on the phone demanding Glenn check his email that instant! :) He calmly reviewed her medical, (how can men stay calm like that???), then looked at her picture and announced, she's ours! It was then up to us to convince everyone else she was ours. :) That was December 21st. Heritage was right on top of things, they immediately overnighted the necessary information to us, we filled everything out, including our letter to China, gushingly begging the most polite way I could figure out to be given the right to adopt little Guan Guanyu as she is known in China. Our LOI (Letter of Intent) was mailed by us on December 26th, as soon as the post office was back open after Christmas! :)


Journey to Pre-pre approval
November 10, 2006
Us being us, of course we couldn't be the typical adoptive family. We have a medical condition in our family that is soon to be on the list of restrictions for China. What that means, was that China had to approve us before we could even apply to adopt in their country. We entered the adoption world officially with as much fear as possible.
Heritage sent a letter on our behalf to China. Basically it said we have a family, they have all these positive qualities to raise a child but also have these possible restriction in a medical issue. We prayed our hearts out and on December 13, 2006, we were given our pre-pre-approval. We were finally scenario approved to start our adoption.



The search is on...
October 30, 2006
The search was on, and I, 'Ms. Research' herself, bombarded the internet for every bit of information the internet had available about adoption. I bet I emailed and/or talked to fifty adoption agencies in our searching. It was during this searching I met a dear friend who has to be part of this website because without her daily encouragement, I don't know if I'd continued on at many times. Her name is Patty:
Patty, take a bow and get your blushing over with! :) Patty is currently on the journey of bringing little Gracie home. :) Patty taught me the best part of the adoption world, the love and support of fellow adoptive parents. They're great! They always have an answer, support or will just whine along with you about how horrible the waiting is. :)
Patty suggested I speak to her agency, Heritage Adoption Services. We did and the rest is history. If you need help, Heritage is great!! They've been very supportive of us. :)




The first thoughts of adoption
October 27, 2006
Our first thoughts of adoption came about after Glenn's aunt in Canada passed away in October 2006. Glenn had to travel back to Canada to be with his family for the funeral and got to see his cousins spending time with their daughters. After coming home, he mentioned he felt like maybe we were missing something not having a little girl. That was all she wrote, we were off and running immediately! :) We considered several countries but our hearts always came back to China. I really think it's all been part of God's because he always knew where our daughter was, even when we didn't yet.